In Pirkei Avot (The Ethics of our Fathers), the Rabbis ask, “Who is a rich man?” They answer, “The one who is happy with his lot.” Once, when I taught this mishna, someone responded, “What happened to motivation? If I’m happy with what I have, I won’t want any more. I won’t try to improve my situation.” My response was, “The mishna is not teaching complacency, but rather the act of being grateful for what I have.”
It’s all about having the correct attitude. The bank account or stock portfolio is not what determines wealth and happiness, it is the attitude of gratitude that will achieve that goal. The Rabbis teach us that we must thank Hashem for everything in life, even what we perceive as negative. We are supposed to view the negative through a positive, loving lens. It states in the Talmud:
“Our Sages tell the story of Rabbi Akiva who was traveling with a donkey, a candle, and a rooster. He went into a city to find a place to sleep and was turned away. ‘Everything Hashem does is for the best,’ he said, and went to spend the night in a field outside the city. His lamp blew out in the wind. ‘Everything Hashem does is for the best,’ he said once again. His rooster was mauled by a fox. ‘Everything Hashem does is for the best,’ he repeated. Then his donkey was eaten by a lion. Once again, Rabbi Akiva repeated the mantra, ‘Everything Hashem does is for the best.’
When he awoke in the morning, he ventured into the city and realized that bandits had attacked it during the night, capturing many people. Had he found a place to stay, he would probably have also been captured. Had the bandits noticed a lamp in a field nearby or heard his donkey or rooster, he might also have been in trouble. Instead, his life was saved by all the ‘bad’ things that happened to him.”
Rabbi Akiva could have responded, “What have I done to deserve this?” or “Why me?” But instead of seeing everything as a divine punishment, he saw it in a positive light and understood that everything is for the good. The ultimate expression of being happy with one’s lot!
When we hit roadblocks in our way, such as a job loss or some other difficulty, we are prone to falling into depression, anxiety, or anger. But if we acknowledge that what seems horrible to us may have a greater purpose, if we can choose Rabbi Akiva’s philosophy of “It’s all for the good” then our attitude and outlook can change. If we understand that it is all part of the “Plan,” we have a better chance of handling things that come our way, and with a positive outlook rather than a negative one, we can face any obstacles. While events may not be under our control, our reaction to them is. We can choose how we view these events. So, let’s try to be like Rabbi Akiva and choose to see the good. Choose happiness!
Rabbi Fred Nebel Director of Jewish Family Services Jewish Federation of St. Joseph Valley
